A house rabbit sitting on a couch.

House Rabbits are Watch Dogs

House Rabbits are Watch Dogs

Rabbits are a trustworthy watchdog.

A plumber walked into our kitchen dining room space yesterday and was greeted by one bunny, one guinea pig, one African Grey, two dogs, two macaws, and four cockatiels. He asked how many kids we had. 

"None that live at home." I answered.

"Oh." He looked around, taking in the scene of a fully functional chaos only known to animal lovers. "Well, they sure do have a lot to say, don't they?" He raised his voice over the din of hellos, weeekings, calls, and one enraged house rabbit in full warning mode. 

Companion animals are all on duty in one form or another.

When bringing a bunny home, you are also installing a full Home Monitoring and Motion Detecting Surveillance System. If an intruder tries to break in, your dog tries to walk downstairs, you try to go to the bathroom, or a cricket wakes up. Your Motion Detecting Bunny with immediately THUMPTHUMP while throwing his blocks across his condo, while running up the ramp to the second floor to THUMP louder, while tossing his paper cups down to the condo's first floor. This will trigger the Secondary Warning Blue Nose Staffordshire System to immediately roll over and start licking your face. After that, it's up to you to handle your defenses.

  • Rabbits have the shortest fuse. Because rabbits don't care what your opinion is on any matter, including security systems.
  • Dogs have two fuses. The first is shorter and releases a response to evil doers and cheese wrappers. The second fuse stops them in their tracks to ask you if A) they can have that cheese, and B) they can have that cheese. Everything sounds like a cheese wrapper.
  • Parrots have a shorter fuse than cats. But not by much. Because cats and companion parrots have a lot in common as far as personality traits. They both have agreed to live with you agreeably as long as you follow their rules.
  • Cats are not interested in your issues.
  • Guinea Pigs are excellent watch dogs on the whole. Their security fuse is their food fuse. The slightest noise could be food. Therefore, all noises will be answered with the double guinea pig 'weeek weeek' screech of starvation. The last time they ate anything was always a week ago.
  • You might think that gerbils have no security goals. You'd be right. Instinctively their fuse is buried deep in their central nervous system. Evil doers afoot will set off that brain button and cause quiet gerbils to explode into fretless spasms of gerbiling. Never grease their gerbil wheel if you'd like to use them as a security system.
Kathy LaFollett is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com.

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