Parrots Cannot Harbor Hate
Birds do not hate. Humans hate. Hate is fatal and only destroys the one that nurtures it. Biologically speaking harboring hate makes you sick. A hateful being will have elevated hormones, blood pressure and stomach acids. A hateful being will sleep poorly, eat poorly, and choose poorly in their actions. A truly hateful being is so blind to real life, they choose in anger and self-pity. In the end a truly hateful being will spend hours defending their victim status to support and uphold the very hate they present as justified. A companion parrot harboring hate makes no sense, nor can it exist fundamentally.
A companion parrot that is aggressive is not full of hate. It lacks understanding by the human in the room. There is no hate in a parrot telling you clearly to walk away. It simply needs the space you are refusing to give up. This is not rejection of company; this is a request for space. Aggressive companion parrots are in dire straits. They are full of fear and full of frustration because there is no understanding. More vitally, unconditional acceptance of their needs. The human in the room plays judge and jury on their requests and decides a bird is bad, aggressive, mean, angry, hateful, or unreasonable. And then the door closes to understanding. Behavior modification training begins making no sense to the parrot, but certainly gives a feeling of control to the human. Which can lead to more miscommunications. Before you know it, you've lived decades with a bird you think hates you. In reality you both stopped communicating long ago. Which boils down the same way for humans as well.
What is hate anyway?
- Pride is a cousin to hate. You need to carry a good boatload of pride to begin the process of building a hateful vessel to carry around. Parrots are a proud being, but not prideful in nature. Arrogance isn't in their DNA. They are simply a parrot.
- Human nature and pride provide a drive inside all humans. The drive to have, own, acquire, or get that which we do not already have, own, or have gotten. Contentment is not a human's first response naturally. A companion parrot's whole flock goal is contentment. Just to be safe, with food, materials and location inside their flock. Once a flock is strong, stable and consistently providing those things a companion parrot wants little else but same. A parrot is not watching TV or looking at advertising for a bigger cage and then glancing over to their own with dread and hateful judgement. That's what humans do.
So, you're wondering at this point, what's my point? I'm not talking about how to fix the parrot in question. I'm not going oversteps to fix an aggressive bird.
Next time you hear someone talking about their parrot being mean or bad, ask them kindly, "Are you trying to have a parrot, or create a relationship?" Next time you find yourself at that moment of impasse with your bird (and we all have them, big or small) ask yourself, "What am I trying to do here, have a parrot, or create companionship?"
There's a big difference in those two motivations. And there is a huge difference in the end results. But in either direction, it is the responsibility of the human in the room.